During an interview, he admitted that when he was in his 20s, he and his then-girlfriend, Maggie, had fallen unexpectedly pregnant. It was a situation that neither had ever imagined seeing themselves in and were at a crossroads with a big decision to make.
After a great deal of discussion, they decided to place the child up for adoption after birth. “[We] discussed many options, including getting married and raising the child ourselves, but we quickly determined we’d be making that decision for the wrong reason,” he started.
“Abortion was never an option, so we began to discuss adoption,” he said. Upon finding out the news, his mother immediately volunteered to take the child and raise her as her own, but Maggie made the choice to keep the adoption outside of the family.
She also made it known that she wanted it to be a closed adoption. Jay, on the other hand, felt quite different. “From the very beginning, I wanted to be in [my baby’s] life. But her mother, Maggie, didn’t want either one of us in her life. That was a hard pill to swallow,” he told.
“I understand that sometimes life sends us reeling because of unexpected situations. But my heart, in that moment, though scared, still desired to be in this beautiful child’s life.”
He continued: “My heart finds satisfaction in knowing that she ended up with a wonderful family, but I’ve had to live with this my entire life. The adoptive family was supposed to give her a letter when she turned 14, explaining that I loved her, did not abandon her, and have tried several ways to make it possible to be in her life.”
While he never admitted if he has been able to connect with the child he never met, it’s apparent that he loves her just as much today as he ever did. Hopefully, through his bold admittance, he will be able to reconnect with her and they will be at peace with the decision that was made so many years ago.